Love

What is love? Many people are very confused by love. They wonder: is love something you can deliberately find, or do you have to wait for it to come to you? Are some people destined to find love and others not? How can you know when you’ve found it? Is there such a thing as true love?

Why do we care so much about love? Love is something that has the potential to bring us great satisfaction and real happiness. We all dream of a love that will fill our lives with joy and last forever. Is everyone who, deep down, would not want that kind of love?

At the same time, love seems to be extremely unpredictable and mysterious. Most of the stories and songs about love do not speak about the joys of love.

There are many songs and poems about lost love, unfaithful love, the search for love, and falling in and out of love. This means that love is not always so easy to understand or to keep.

Everyone wants to love and be loved. In one way or another, love occupies the minds of all of us on a daily basis. It is perhaps the most written- about topic of poetry, song and story.

When one person gives love to another, creating a desire within the other person to return that love, a circuit is created, like electricity. This may create a bond that neither side wants to break. Eventually, the bond created between the two may become so strong that no force in the universe could break it. In this case two partners become as one being. They can’t imagine anything else but to be together in love.

Why does a circuit of love once begun, sometimes get broken? Selfishness creeps into love relationships when instead they are meant to be focused upon the other person. That is how the circuit- and the heart- gets broken.

The highest and most mature form of love is selfless. It is love that gives without expecting anything in return. It does not change just because it doesn’t get something back right away. Of course, everyone desires to be at the receiving end of Love, but a mature person focuses more on giving love than receiving it. Such love is unconditional.

Human beings long for unconditional love. When we experience unconditional love, it gives us a deep sense of peace, security, value, and well-being. This kind of love says that we are loved for who we are without having to do anything for it. We are loved not because we meet certain conditions, but simply because have value as human being.

Unconditional love can commonly be seen in parental love. Truly loving parents do not step to calculate how much they have given their children and decide that it is enough. They love their child simply because he or she is their child, and they want to give him or her everything they can so the child can have a good life. This kind of love knows no limits- the parents will work day and night for the benefit of their child.

However, a form of conditional love is also necessary in order for growth to occur. Parents give conditional love to their children as well.

Conditional love, guided by principles and expectations, is an important side of love. If we really love someone, we naturally want them to do good things and to feel happy about life. Parents give their children conditional love to guide and encourage the children to behave in such a way as to experience this joy. It is always for the sake of the child.

Most of people have a self-centered love. Self-centered love is a different story altogether. Self-centered love is so common; it almost appears to be the norm. It is not, however.

We can easily be taken in by self-centered love. The motivation behind self-centered love is to fulfill one’s own needs and desires rather than being truly concerned about the other, but, this motivation may be very deeply buried. The person may not even be aware that this is how he or she is “loving” the other.

Self centered love says things like: “I’ll love you as long as you make me look good.” “I’ll love you as long as you have sex with me.” “I’ll love you as long as you spend money on me.”

People marry because they think they lovesome another, but after a while they divorce. If love were truly present, could it simply disappear? Through bitter experience many people come to learn there is big difference between genuine love and what often passes for love in our world.

It is easy to be fooled by self-centered love. Our emotional and sexual feelings are strong and they carry us away. It feels like real love. But if we look deeply into our hearts or into the heart of the other person, we often will see self-centeredness at work. What we really want from this person we “love” is a flattering mirror reflecting ourselves. We actually care very little for the other person and much more for the way he or she makes us feel about ourselves.

Because self-centered love is so deceptive, it is important not to get physically involved until both people are ready to make a lasting commitment to one another in marriage. Otherwise, sexual excitement blinds us to the real nature of the relationship, and we wind up with broken hearts. Scientists have found that kind people who love people in general in an unselfish way have happier, long-lasting, love-filled marriages

True love is unselfish love. It is always for the sake of the other person. True love may be unconditional or conditional.

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Love and Relationships

Are you in a committed healthy romantic relationship that’s very good for not only you, but equally for the person you love. Love and relationships are to become made for ever, not only a few days. Take a look into getting your life much more enjoyable and purposeful by realizing how to act when it comes to those you care most for.

The greatest thing to do in a romantic relationship is to care for the other person´s needs ahead of your own. Being selfless is the core of what love is all about. If you’re having issues with selfishness you need to deal with them successfully ahead of coming into a marriage or other serious personal relationship. Why pull another individual into your issues? In the event you really desire to help them, you’ll need to put them before yourself. This suggests sacrifice. Selfish individuals aren’t prepared to make sacrifices for other people. If you’re this way, save the individual you claim to adore the painfulness of finding out.

An additional significant factor of love and relationships will be the neglected virtue of commitment. Society tends to make it difficult for a guy and a lady to maintain the dedication of holy matrimony. Within the United states of america one is actually compelled to fork out much more taxes should you be married than should you just stay together. But what does “staying together” tell society? It tells the world you desire the pleasures and advantages of matrimony with no dedication. Again, this really is selfish. Don’t forget; love isn’t self-centered. Do the right thing. In case you genuinely would like to live for a partner, make an open public commitment of holy matrimony and get the advantages of a clear conscience as well.

For anyone who is seeking to become married to end your being lonely, this is a self-centered reason. Are you going into a marriage to help make yourself happier? How many individuals are doing this very thing and rendering their lives and the lives of others unpleasant during the process? Love and relationships are created to be mutually satisfying to both persons. If one side starts to have unrealistic expectations, it could be a ticking time bomb of feelings. What will happen when both parties have unrealistic expectations? This really is a formula for failure. When coming into critical personal romantic relationships, it can be very good to have wide open communication channels. You ought to discuss all the expectations you might have plus the other half must do likewise. The word “all” is emphasized in that previous sentence. Money, sex, the long term, kids and any other important topic should be brought out in to the discussion and frankly pointed out. Getting transparent and sincere may be the greatest policy in romance.

Love and relationships are to be held in high esteem when they’re seen within the bonds of marriage. This partnership will be the bonding fabric of humankind. In case you mess it up, you aren’t doing anybody a favour. About three of five marriages in the Usa are faltering, according to available data. Do not be a contributor of this break down of the social structure.

In case you are not one to keep your word, especially in marriage, it’s best to keep out of the romantic relationship. Get your life in order. Grow to be the person that others can model their existence around. Later on, enter into a meaningful romantic relationship that makes the other person the object of importance. Be selfless and become happy.

John writes about love and relationships and how to get your ex back with you.

Article from articlesbase.com

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Im Still In Love My Ex May Not Be

You might say, “I’m still in love, my ex isn’t.” This is a difficult situation. First of all, you don’t really know that your ex is not still in love with you, too. Your ex may have claimed to not love you anymore, and that’s possible. But it’s also possible that he or she still harbors feelings for you. Many couples who still love each other very much break up for other reasons.
If you can honestly say, I’m still in love my ex, there’s a good chance your ex might still love you. But that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a good idea to try to get back together. You broke up for a reason. Even if you didn’t want to break up and the break off was entirely your ex’s doing, really think hard about things. It’s rare that a person can’t think back and see reasons why the break-up might be for the best. It isn’t always easy right at first when you’re still in so much pain from the break-up, but with time you’ll probably see that the break-up might even be good for you.
If the break-up was mutual and now you’re having a hard time because you feel “I’m still in love, my ex should be here with me,” then it’s even more important that you examine why you agreed to the break-up in the first place. Yes, there is a chance that a mutual split was a mistake. But if you’ll really look back at the reasons you both had for calling a halt to the relationship, you might find that’s better to love your ex from afar and work through the sadness rather than try to rekindle the romance.
“I’m still in love; my ex even wants to get back together.” While this might make you feel very hopeful that the two of you might be able to work things out and live happily ever after, don’t be fooled into thinking that it will be easy. The reasons you broke up are still there. If you get back together, what will change? Your relationship might go along well for a while because you’re both so happy to be back together.
If you broke up thinking, I’m still in love my ex, and he or she thought the same so you got back together, you’ll go through a honeymoon period just as you did when you were a new couple. You’ll both feel like you saved the relationship and kept each other from making a horrible mistake. But that feel-good honeymoon period will wear off eventually. And then what will you do?
How are you going to prevent the problems that caused you to break up in the first place from coming back and making you want to part ways again? Couples counseling is a good option. If you think, “I’m still in love my ex and want him or her back,” then consider counseling to keep old problems from splitting you up again later.

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Why Real Love Requires Self Love

MAIN QUOTE

“We are want to condemn self-love; but what we really mean to condemn is contrary to self-love. It is that mixture of selfishness and self-hate that permanently pursues us, that prevents us from loving others, and that prohibits us from losing ourselves.” ~ Paul Valery, French Poet, 1871 – 1945

DR. LISA LOVE REFLECTIONS

As a counselor I have often told people that they need to learn to love themselves. Yet, while saying this to others, I have at times taken pause to reflect and ask myself, “What does that really mean? How do we know the difference between a self-love and a selfish love? And, what can we do practically to love ourselves in the right way?” Perhaps the quote above holds a clue, because I believe true self love fills us with enough joy, peace, and love that our desire to be loving human beings grows. Because of this we want to express more empathy, compassion, and understanding towards others. Selfish love does the contrary. It increases our sense of self-loathing or our disdain and anger towards others. It causes us to act increasingly in our own best interests without considering the interests of others. It causes us to want to sacrifice others needs and desires in service to our own, instead of the other way around. Or, it causes us to self-destruct through a number of behaviors that may feel good temporarily, but ultimately they lead to the shutting down of our hearts and spiral us downward into increased self-loathing and self-reproach.

How then do we love ourselves in the right way? By first and foremost learning what love is. Then, by insisting that we feed ourselves with that love. This is best done by finding people who know how to love. From them we learn how to adopt loving mindsets, feelings, and behaviors. And, it is done by setting boundaries on people who don’t know how to encourage the greatest level of love in us. Because when we truly have that kind of love in our lives we are increasingly a blessing to others. Which is why real love requires that we love ourselves in the right way, so we can have the strength to love, the wisdom to love, and the energy to love those who need our love the most.

Blessings,

Dr. Lisa Love

FREE GIFTS ON MY WEBSITE: Go to: http://www.doctorlisalove.com/freegifts.html

Dr. Lisa Love is the founder of LoveMovies! and also the best-selling author of BEYOND THE SECRET: Spiritual Power and the Law of Attraction; ATTRACTING REAL LOVE: 4 Steps for Finding the Love You Want; and SOUL SUCCESS: How to Create Joy & Prosperity in Good Times or Bad; MEDITATION: The Path to Peace. Buy these books and receive bonus gifts at my website. She is also a Life, Relationship, Law of Attraction, and Tranformational coach. There’s a reason my clients tell me by working with me they get major breakthroughs fast! Decades of coaching and counseling experience combined with my extensive training and work with clients from all backgrounds help my clients make shifts in a rapid way. Contact me to discover what I can do for you.

FREE GIFTS ON MY WEBSITE: Go to: http://www.doctorlisalove.com/freegifts.html

WEBSITE: http://www.doctorlisalove.com
EMAIL: lisa@doctorlisalove.com
FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/doctorlisalove
FAN PAGE on FACEBOOK:http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dr-Lisa-Love/48936741770
LOVEMOVIES: http://www.lovemoviesonline.com
TWITTER: http://www.twitter.com/doctorlisalove

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Why do men love women?

What have women got that men just can’t stop going crazy over them? Is it because of love or lust? What makes those two diverge? At the early age of puberty, men feels fascinated to women. They have the penchant also to be attracted to older girls even at the age of 7. This is because older girls are a lot sexier and attractive. It looks they see their mother in older girls. Younger men feel pampered by older women. Older women tend to understand younger men more particularly in their mood. But as they grow older, men love women younger than them or at their age.

How can you actually define love or differentiate love from lust? Is it love that men felt when they spot a woman and feel something? Well I could declare that it would take time to finally conclude that what he or she feels is already that issue called love.

Love is past physical, it is something you can’t touch. When you can forgive and forget what a person has caused you, then that is love.

Lust, on the other hand is still an feeling that is merely physical.This is linked with the feeling of craving a person sexually but oftentimes leads to Love and wanting to impart something beyond physical.

You can say you really love a person if in a longer span of time, you remain fascinated to him or her physically and later on turned into something sensitively distinctive.

Steps to draw men:

1) Fill up your love tank- love the people surrounding you, welcome their decency, love yourself. Men are more fascinated to women who illustrate that they are to be respected and valued. Friends can help particularly affectionate and wonderful friends. It will present in your well-being if you are full of love and when you are full of love, you can love others already.
2) Cook up Love – Be the master of the kitchen and attract your man through his stomach.
3) Be yourself – While men loves being pursued, most men still love to chase women. Shine in other things so he would perceive you; for example if he is a school mate then excel in the classroom. If he is a neighbor who doesn’t even give a look, then start by giving the mother some new recipes to cook. Act as if he’s not your goal and let him target you instead.

Men are born polygamous and they tend to glance elsewhere and this is extremely important when looking for a mate. We don’t know for sure how to keep his attention unless of course if he really loves you that much not to consider hurting your feelings. You have to take the chance, for it might be precious in the end and anyway life is a risk you have to take and that incorporates loving someone.

Men have crabbiness too that need women to shut up so it is important to know the nature of men. Listen and don’t nag but be sharp in studying the thin line that separates listening and enabling your partner to fool you. Solving troubles in a relationship is in the hands of a woman. It is hard for women to keep their men and keep them interested with them all the time. Keep you man enthralled with you through these steps:

1) The center of a relationship should be reliance.Faith and trust must at all times be present.

1) CREATE MOMENTS TOGETHER. Typically men do this; out of the blue men would propped a date in some passionate place just for two; a candlelight dinner, with a music in the background or may be a little bit offhand as just walking in Manila Bay at sunset, a picnic at the Park or in the Zoo, for those of smaller budget, but whatever it is what is important is that you make some moments together, because that is what life is all about.

2) Share your dreams and aspirations to your loved one. Your relationship does not consist of you alone so when it comes to your thoughts and aspirations, see if it fits with his. How close or far apart, similar or conflicting are your dreams and his dreams, then you’ll know if you are to go on this relationship or not. Never give up a dream just to satisfy your partner’s emotional insecurities as this will be the cause of the potential breakdown of your relationship in the end.

3) DON’T NAG. Learn to listen to your partner’s side and don’t be a faultfinder. Your relationship must have trust in order to have future. Nurture and win trust instead of abusing it.

4) Be a friend first and became lovers later on. Lovers should only be second from friendship to make it continue longer.

Women fascinates men who knows how to handle themselves. Women that can encourage and comfort a man in times of sorrow.In a relationship, man should not be the only one who’s strong. In fact, when it comes to feelings, women are stronger. That is fairly obvious. For more advices how to deal with men or women relationship visit http://women-men-love.info they sure have lots of thoughts to ascertain from.

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A General Theory of Love